Sunday, March 19, 2017

Been a busy old week here.
in process of changing my credit card over to one that's interest free after last weeks bombshell of having spent over the loan and that I had a lot more to pay off than I thought!

I want to do the same with my bank account and that's going to be a work in progress come Wednesday payday.
11 months interest free would be super useful!

This weekend we (I and Dog) drove to Peterborough for a competition. She ran really well and shaved a few seconds off of her optimum time. I would LOVE to get her down to under 5 seconds. We'll see.

Had a nice meal with some of our team mates both Friday and Saturday, there's a guy there my age with a dog who comes irregularly. I tried to imagine dating him. Failed. urgh.

Mothership comes home Thursday for sommat or another and I won a raffle! Yippie! I never win one and its a 50 pound gift card that was free entry after signing back up for contacts.

So very tired today driving home, didn't ride in the end had a long old nap with dog curled up on my lap.

Did a few jumps with the horse last week, almost looked like decent sized cross pole at the end and now to build on that and start from scratch with an upright and then move to my nemesis the oxer (two jumps close together and jumped as one)

Next comp is over Easter. I said I wasn't available for the Sunday so hoping to get selected for Saturday or Monday. Failing that next one will be Bank Holiday.


Monday, March 06, 2017

Went on a bloody pointless training course today, supposed to be about learning management and leadership skills.
Failed to learn either. Still. didn't have to go to work, didn't have to be in Wooly until 9.45 and was home an hour earlier than normal.

Last night I thought it'd be fun to do a "on this day" looking back through my blogger posts for March and back.

Some of it was fun, memories of drunken nights with friends in Derby, o travelling adventures some of it was sad reading about Welshy and how much fun we used to have together and then how it all died. Some of it was utterly heartbreaking remembering Dad and those last few months together.

I read too of awful comments Mother made and I find myself doubting the words I've written. Did she really tell me I was too stupid to take a job? Did she really, repeatedly tell me how awful I am compared to the Brat. Did she ever pay back the thousand pounds I've lent her?

My posts at some point changed from full of hope, that I would one day free myself from this, make something of myself, to bitter resignation.
I no longer have hope that I will do that. Life that keeps me in London, the economy that makes it impossible for me to live in London independently has killed that.

Perhaps it went when I lost the job in Bedfordshire. The final nail on the coffin when she failed to make good on the promise that I'd have some of the inheritance. I kept a foolish hope that one day Welshy would pull himself together and help me get out of this mess, but yet I always planned how I'd keep the both of us, knowing that nothing would change.

 I just have to keep on treading water, those debts are slowly going, Only 600 pounds left of a one time 2,800 credit card debit. I can pay that off in 6 months if I do a 100 pounds a month. I can pay it off in three months if I can carry on the 200 a month I'm currently paying back.

Then to focus on the overdraft. I can do this, not sure yet of the best procedure to do so. and then next August the bank loan I took out will be done and I can rebuild. 16 more months. Then who knows?

Well I do now know. I will be here still. And I will be here in another 10 years.

Sunday, March 05, 2017

On/off week back at work. Manager is applying for funding to create a new role and its something I'd like to go for but a) the self-doubt creeps in as to whether I'd actually be suitable or able to cope for it.
b) the funding only lasts for three years. I have no intentions on being unemployed at the end of three years as stands to reason that my role now wouldn't still be available and would have gone elsewhere.

V has had a bit of a cough this week and therefore we've had a bit of a slump after last weeks high of how well she was going, can't hold it against her nor let it get me down.

I did shit loads of planting yesterday, spent far too much money in the garden centre, created a new hanging basket for the porch and planted candytuft, begonias, a mixed planter and a raspberry bush.

I'd toying with the idea of getting a planter for carrots but we'll leave that I think until payday at the end of this month as I've got a hotel stay in Peterborough for a competition weekend after next and really I should tidy the patio up so I can plant them and carry on battling the weeds in the front garden.

Tomorrow I am attending a leadership and management course. We'll see if we're able to put any of it into practice.....

Sunday, February 26, 2017

I've been off this week, as part of Mother's inheritance she decided to put some money into doing the porch. (our old porch has been without a door for at least 8 years).
Of course as benefits my life this has not been without its dramas.
Monday 8am they arrive and cheerily inform me that there has been a cockup and the scaffolding needed wouldn't be arriving until lunchtime and I was to call them then.
So I took dog to Greeny Park, it was a glorious sunny day. The first of a week of sun I hoped and we threw sticks, met some nesting parrots and had a lovely walk.
The scaffolding arrived at 1.30, so as requested I called them and left a voicemail. They called me back at 3.30 and said it was a bit late to do anything now and I'd see them Tuesday Morning at 8am.

Tuesday morning and as stated they were indeed there at 8am. I left them cracking on and took Dog to Lullingstone. Not as lovely a day but we still had a nice walk and a yummy cake and hot chocolate after. I got home about 12.45 and workmen were gone, however they have destroyed my tulip border.
I was struggling that day to be perky for some reason and took this quite hard. I have slowly been taking more and more of an interest in my front garden, removing slowly all the weeds and brambles and having grass reclaim it.
The tulips I'd originally brought for Nan and Granddad's Grave. There was red ones and white ones and some that were red and white petalled. (Charlton colours obvs) I was getting excited about them sprouting and hoped that only two or three weeks more might see buds arrive.

Wednesday no one came. I sat in until lunchtime then gave up and took Dog to Oxleas Wood where we had a muddy walk and then came home and a shower. Mother hinted that they might have called her but it was 1am her time (currently she is in LA) I rang through about 2.30ish and discovered that yes - despite having given them my number and landline they had ignored that and rung her instead.

Thursday - (bear in mind that the work was supposed to be Monday-Wednesday only) The man arrived shortly after 8am. 10 minutes after arriving he knocks on the door and very apologetically tells me that its been measured wrong and won't fit together. He promises to give me a call and return later that afternoon or early Friday. I don't hold out much hope for him returning that afternoon and I was proved right.

Friday no one came and we went to Foots Cray Meadow for a sunny walk along the river, bit annoyed that the weather had only just turned to sun again and this had also scuppered my plans to do gardening and aviary cleaning although I was still disheartened by Tulip Massacre.

I rang again mid afternoon and was told someone would call back - which they did! They promised to arrive Saturday and said that they had only just got the replacement parts.

I was pleasantly surprised to see him arrive Saturday and he cracked on throughout the day only leaving at 3.30 as weather was changing and promises to come on Monday when I am back at work to finish off the gaps around the edging.

This has been a bit of a crappy way to have a week off as I've done very little due to weather and porch dramas. I also found that I can't have my planned week off over May due to my boss needing an operation and being off for a month. Busy now trying to re-plan this as I'm determined to go.

Monday, February 13, 2017

Been a busy old week here. Work has been pretty full on but in a good way - had my appraisal today which went better than this time last year!

We did a flyball contest at the weekend - our team came last but hey ho, its all a learning curve for us and best of all it was an early finish so I was home by 6.30!

The weather has been shit, and not the good kind of shit, its been horrid sleety snow thats tried to settle and failed. V did look quite pretty with the snow melting into her forelock and mane though as I rode Friday night.

The Twins are coming back to visit me in June, it has been decided. They would like to see the Trooping of the Colour I'm not too fussed but it'll be nice to see them. Will need to look and find a nice walk/adventure to take them on.

I am planning my first solo holiday island hopping in Greece, but I had planned for June as it would be cheaper and nice weather so we'll see now...
Was definitely gonna need to book it up in stages to make it more affordable, but we'll plan that out come next Wednesday as to whether or not I have big enough balls to book the flights.

Sunday, January 29, 2017

I forgot! Been now a whole year without Welshy in my life. Well just as a friend. Bizarre. We still catch up once or twice a week.

Nearly failed in my new mission of blogging at least once a week. 

Rome was lovely - at least 10 degrees warmer than the current vile -2 here! Saw so much more of it than last time's whirlwind tour with the Mothership.
Lolly good company as hoped and no awkwardness. Took train down to Pompeii and did that thoroughly as well.

Gave me a lot of possibly false confidence about travelling alone, currently trying to see if a trip to Athens and some island hopping might be feasible come June. I also am thinking about Romania in September.

We'll see..... 

Hoping it warms up a little here, no fun walking the dog in the cold and the poor horse has been trapped in her box as too cold to turn out in the field and too hard to ride in the school.

Monday, January 16, 2017

Off to Rome tomorrow, hope it'll be fine!

Dog did her first comp of year, fucked up one heat but still finished 3rd.

I tried a face mask tonight! Remember how cool it was to do the PVA glue thing on your hand at school. Peeling it off was just like that!